If Will Ferrell Came To My House...
Who would it be?
This is essentially what Ilana Wiles of Mommy Shorts asked me. You see, Ilana has a new show found on ULive where she interviews celebrities in her house!
I will tell you what I would do if any celebrity came to my house. FREAK THE FREAK OUT.
Ilana lives in New York City, though, where it is not a big deal at all to see a celebrity jogging, getting a straw or fixing a wedgie. Really, it's like people who live in NYC are practically celebrities themselves.
What is a big deal is when one of them sits on your couch, even if your couch is in NYC like Ilana's. So far she has interviewed Taye Diggs and Rachel Dratch. Well, she AND her daughter, Mazzy, have interviewed these people. She's got a real Mazzy Winfrey on her hands.
When Ilana asked who I would interview if I had my choice, I scratched my head and pondered for a long time between Jack Black, Kristen Wiig and Will Ferrell. That's a hard decision, right? I love Jack Black. I really, really love Jack Black.
But, I picked Will Ferrell. He's got a new Anchorman coming out, as you no doubt know. Every weekend, my husband and I have this conversation:
Me: "Hey, you want to go to a movie?"
Him: "Is the new Anchorman out yet?"
Me: "No."
Him: "Then, no."
If Will Ferrell was IN my house being interviewed, maybe my husband would consider another movie.
Seriously, though, WHAT IF WILL FERRELL WAS IN MY HOUSE??
I can hardly handle the thought.
Before he even entered the house, I would ask him to show me one of his SNL tryout skits were he pretends to be a businessman pretending to be a cat while alone in his office. I love that skit hard. He has no shame.
The requests would snowball from there. He would have constant props placed in his hands or would be slightly shoved to different locations around my house.
YARN: For that aforementioned cat skit.
POM POMS: I'd be Cheri O'Teri.
ORGAN: For our Alta Dena Middle School flashback.
NEWS DESK: I would plead for him to say "The human torch had trouble getting a bank loan" in front of a mirror.
HOT TUB: The problem here is that I would tell him that the word "lover" is not allowed at my house. This skit tribute with Rachel Dratch might have to get scratched.
And, of course...
A COWBELL: bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump
I really don't know how we would have time to sit down to conduct an interview. And, anyway, how could a person actually look at Will Ferrell and be serious?
This is why I would probably have to ask my two boys to pick up some of the interviewing load.
"Mr. Will, do you want to see the house I made on MineCraft?" is probably what my 8-year-old would ask. After a few hours of Will listening to him describe all of the rooms that go on forever, he would then ask him to go play football.
My 5-year-old would ask him if he wants to watch him tie his shoe.
They'd also ask him if he had any snacks. (They actually told me that one just now.)
They'd also ask him if he had any snacks. (They actually told me that one just now.)
Then they would all build something with Legos. Something tells me that if they accidentally knocked over Will's creation, he would let them have it and punctuate his anger with "I DRIVE A DODGE STRATUS!!"
Something tells me that I would be whispering to my children, "Okay, that is a bad word. Let's not say that."
Something tells me that I would beg and plead for him not to peek into my disaster of a study but that he would and wouldn't even notice the mess.
Something tells me that I would ask for a piggy back ride.
Something tells me that we would ask if Will could come over to play again.
Which celebrity would you want to invite to your house??
**Check out Mommy Shorts' ULive channel by going HERE.***